An old Russian man is at his dying wife's bedside.
The doctor on visit to their apartment looks her over and says, “I’m terribly sorry, but the only way to save your wife is to have anal sex with her.”
“I can’t do it,” says the man, “I’m a loyal Communist and have dutifully served my country. I fought the entire war and earned many medals, including Hero of the Soviet Union. Hell, I even held Lenin in my arms as he was dying.”
“Like I said, intercourse is the only way to save your wife.” says the doctor and leaves.
Later that night, the man decides to take the doctor’s advice, mounts his wife and starts pounding away. After a few moments, he becomes exhausted and falls asleep.
The next morning, the man wakes up and sees the other side of the bed is empty. Listening more intently, he makes out the sound of pots and pans clanging in the kitchen. He gets up, walks over to the kitchen, and sees his wife doing dishes and humming with joy. As he watches her, he suddenly slaps his forehead and says:
“What an old fool I am. I could have saved Lenin!”