Guy decides to surprise his wife by coming home from his vacation a day early.
He’s happy to see that she’s still up, as the lights are on in the bedroom, so he grabs the flowers and the chocolate, quietly let’s himself through the front door, goes up the stairs and peeks in.
To his shock, he sees TWO set of feet sticking out from under the covers, the large set on top, engaged in a sawing machine ballet.
Beside himself with shock and grief, he retreats down the steps, drops the box of chocolates and the flowers in defeat as his life flashes before his eyes.
His suicidal thoughts are interrupted by the 'mattress testing' getting louder.
He snaps, grabs a baseball bat and goes back into the bedroom.
There he goes to town on the love birds under the blankets, whacking until all movement stops.
A few minutes later, he is in his kitchen, contemplating ending himself, when his wife comes up from the basement.
“Hi baby,” she says. “I’m very happy to see you back early, but since you weren’t supposed to be here tonight and your parents showed up late, I hope you don’t mind I let them have our bedroom for the night. I’m pretty sure they’re still up, have you had a chance to say hello?”